Portland Stabber Whack Job Turns Out To Be An Even Bigger Whack Job

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Every now and then, one hot story blazes through the media and we just don’t touch it here at Little Guy Liberal. That’s usually because any one of: (a) It’s a trivial story and not important enough to amplify, (b) it’s a recap of something we’ve already talked to death here without new development, or (c) everybody else is jumping on the bandwagon so much that it would be pointless for us to post about it too.

Such was the case with the Portland stabbing guy, Jeremy Joseph Christian. He’s been the top story for a little under a week now, and yes, it’s a tragic situation where you can come to the defense of someone getting abused by a White Supremacist only to get stabbed to death for your trouble. But what can we add to that? It’s also shameful of Trump to not comment on the incident until much too little, too late. But again, a hundred other sites already jumped on that one, what more is there to say?

That is, until we got a look at him. Mother of God, it’s like the sickness at the heart of America developed a tumor that grew legs and got up walking around. Is he a big, fat, entitled, neckbeard with flowing princess locks to show he’s never been judged in his life? Check. Did he throw his support behind all the nutball candidates? Check. Is he not only a modern neo-Nazi, but an attention whore who posts his Nazi salutes on YouTube because he thinks that’s adorable? Check.

Oh, and one more thing: He’s also an anti-circumcision wonk. Now, this last seems baffling until you’ve met one. For some strange reason (modern neo-Nazis hating on Jews, probably), circumcision is a topic that draws rapid and rabid response on the Internet whenever you bring it up. Most guys (and gals, for that matter) shrug, considering it not that big a deal either way, but there’s this massive cult online that bellows about circumcision being unjust and non-consensual mutilation and all kinds of stuff. So anyway, they apparently have issues about their weenie.

Here’s to Jeremy Joseph Christian’s prison shower-mates, who now get to examine him for themselves and report back to us as to just what the hell’s wrong down there anyway. It’s so rare to catch an anti-circumcision wonk in the wild.

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